Birthday Celebration

On my 16th birthday, I was given a surprise party. It wasn't until some 14 years later, that I had another one. 30 was a raving 80's party that was a dress up event that caught me off guard. Yesterday I turned 34, and my birthday celebration was a date with my wife. That is all I wanted, uninterrupted one-on-one conversation with Jenelle. The kids, we had some great friends offer to take them so we could go out. Those type of friends rock, by the way. Over the years I have shied away from big ol' birthday celebrations. For me, I'm a quality time guy and I'd rather hang with some friends and family any old given day rather than be the center of attention for a short window of time(some things change with age I guess). So my birthday celbration was a hot date with my wife to Anthony's restaraunt in Olympia. One of the restaurants we had yet to hit since we had been in Oly. I had precious cards written and colored by 3 wonderful kids and an early mornign phone call from Luke, my 7 year old, as he was in Cali, with Nana & Grandpa on vacation. 34 is the age this year, and I look forward to tackling this year with energy, adventure, and perseverance. The key for me to staying young is to make family a priority, think young, think healthy, and live out my life plan.

The Value of a Life Plan

Four years ago I sat down and created a LifePlan. This Life Plan helped me map out areas of my life that needed structure, goals, vision, and action. I found myself in a place where I was aiming at multiple targets and not concentrating on any of them very well. The Life Plan process was simple. I went to a secluded place where any distractions would be void(Oregon Coast on a cliff overlooking the Pacific), turned off my cell phone and began to write. I focused on 7 areas (or accounts) in my life: health, career/church, marriage and family, personal life fulfillment, spiritual life, self development/replenishing, and lifestyle. Over the years this has transformed into a plan that includes 100 dreams, a purpose statement, roles that I desire to lead and live, and a place to keep me accountable to my life plan. This was a great launching point for me to challenge myself through scripture and strategies to live a life that God has designed for me. If you are in a place where you feel like you are in a rut, feeling unmotivated, are not being challenged or accountable to anyone or anything, or are flat out unhappy, I challenge you to find key areas in your life to focus on. Develop a life plan. Build a strategy that will give you a place where you are comfortable with who God made you to be. This is a great tool and I have found it to be rewarding and beneficial as I live out a life of leadership. I trust it can be useful to you too.

The MJ Infatuation

Michael Jackson was a gifted dancer and singer. He brought the music industry to the place it is today. In the American idol, culture crazed society we live in today, I hope you can see what is wrong with the picture we have created for superstars. I heard a guy explain that he spent $1200 to get to LA to be a part of the MJ funeral lottery (which is disturbing) and then spent $700 on new threads to wear to the memorial service. I'm thinking "really?" This guys wasn't even a shoe-in for the service. The only thing this guy knew about MJ was the fact that he was an iconic hero and he wanted to be a part of the circus, the media created. MJ was talented, but over the last 10 years he had turned more into a circus side show, than an entertainer. Somewhere on the road of his life, something went weird with Michael. Maybe it was his lack of a normal childhood, maybe it was the fame and money, Bubbles-the chimp, I'm just saying, something didn't pan out. We are so quick to annoint him, when in reality his life had spiraled down pretty quick. Upon his death, culture mourned, over-covered the event, and talked about it way too long. Yes, our culture has worshipped him for decades. The sad thing is that people are justifying the many things wrong with the picture because of his talent. Our culture does this with many people that have this pop culture following. We give them an excuse and a pass when they do wrong, because of status. The sad thing is that neither MJ, nor any other celeb is going to save us, or bring us into some unknown reality of a life we live in. I watched some of the over-exposed coverage and I think people are looking for a Savior. People will have to realize that a Savior will come, but it will not be one who is flawed.

Fresh Eyes and Leadership

"Fresh Eyes" is a term every leader should have in their repetoire. As a leader, I have trained myself to occasionally take a look at things we are doing as a ministry, leadership, and church and get fresh perspective. Last night in our Welcome to ECC class, our Lead Pastor, Dale Oquist, asked those in the class(most of who are new to the church community in recent months) what are things we could do better at, or get rid of; and what do they think we do well in. Perspective is an amazing thing. There were some things I heard that weren't shocking so to speak, and their were a few that I took mental notes on. The best thing is I serve on a leadership team, that is unafraid to ask those very questions. From these discussions we take away perspective from "fresh eyes". This keeps us sharp, moving forward, and evolving as leaders of our ministries and keeps the church fresh. I would tend to say I have a good eye for things needing to be changed, updated, or refreshed. So who are your "fresh eyes" that you are asking to critique you? Two things we established in our time: 1. be honest 2. you are helping us move forward so help us in answering with things that come immediately to your mind. I walked away with appreciation for everyone apart of the conversation. A great reminder that excellent leaders are not afraid to ask the tough questions and fresh eyes are a benfit to have in your community.

Over Prepared Leaders in Small Groups

Have you ever been in a small group where the "leader" dominates the speaking or small group time? OK, guilty leader blushing...now. I know there are groups all over the country, at least one in every church, where the leader teaches and does not engage the small group participants. I will go on record saying, sometimes there are groups of new Christ followers, that need to be in an environment were that is fostered. However, for a group Christ followers the playing field should be leveled at times. As a leader of a copious small group ministry and a participant in groups over the last 15 years, I find the smoothest groups are one where a leader asks a lot of questions to get people talking. It is not uncommon for one to over-prepare themselves to lead. I think this can come out of a few different mentalities. Here are some common reasons for over-preparedness: a fear of not having enough to keep a group talking; a teaching only environment works; the thought that as a spiritual leader they need to have all the answers and the talking points, insecurities as a leader, a belief that as the leader they should be super prepared, maybe it is because that is all they have ever seen, and finally maybe it is a personality thing.
In building community one will soon realize that as a group grows together the freedom to get others involved and maybe even lead will be recognized. At least it should, and if not the group will eventually dissolve. The best small group materials available offer a thoguht, and then revolve it around some key points with lots of questions. For small group growth to occur, the fostering of leadership and the art of the asking questions need to be learned.
Over-preparedness can be a small group killer. It can cause groups to grow tired, dreadful, lost, and lackluster. Ask lots of right questions and inspire people to respond. It is doesn;t take much, but it does take.

Connecting With Leaders

There is one important task that must not be overlooked in leadership. That is the art of conencting with leaders. When you connect with leaders it should be on two levels: business & relational. Let me break that down. About the business: When you are meeting with leaders you should always keep the vision in front of them and intentionally keep them motivated about the vision. Know where you want to end and get there in the time allotted. At the same time you should allow plenty of time for relational conversation to take place. How is life, family, work, what makes them laugh in recent days, and let the talk be about them. I have a friend who recently told me he used to get invited to meet with a ministry leader, and he always started the time together by asking, "Is this about business, or is this about hanging out?" This way he knew where the leader intended to go, and help him get there. If it was about hanging out, my friend would be able to navigate as he was comfortable enough to do. I think there are many ways you can meet with leaders, but the important part is to make the time effective, and not let the person you meet with feel like it is a waste of their valuable time. Challenging leaders is a must, and inspiring vision is too, but don't forget to ask a lot of questions and get other people talking. Sometimes a meeting is about checking the gauges of those around you, and that is important. Connecting with leaders helps you grow, flow, and go. Make it a priority and get in their world when you can.

Urgent or Important?

I was challenged today to think about what is urgent and what is important. It made me realize that sometimes I live with this tension of deciding what is what. Sometimes I also think urgent things are important, and they are not. So many times I forget to realize that the person I am trying to be like, CHRIST, was the perfect example of figuring what was urgent and what was important. In John 17, Jesus in His prayer makes a claim that is worth thinking about. He declared that His work was completed. But weren't there more miracles to do, weren't there more people that needed to hear His message, shouldn't He have met with more people? Jesus had a peace in His heart that when He was done, He was ready to call it good for the work God had given him. Throughout Jesus' ministry, He often waited for God to direct Him. I love what Hummel says, in Tyranny of the Urgent relating to Lazarus and the call to come see him. "The urgent need was to prevent the death of a brother, a friend....But the important thing from God's point of view was to raise Lazarus from the dead." This is a great reminder for everyone to live by. You need to decide what you are going to do with your time. We only have 24 hours a day and if we had more, we would find a way to fill it. As an action, take some time to look at your schedule and evaluate what is urgent and what is important. Think about what is eating up your schedule and time. If you prioritize the important, you will go a long way and be successful in all you are doing. Timing is everything and will take you a long way in life.