Things I learned Coaching 1-2 graders

This last weekend my first head coaching gig came to an end. I had the privilege to coach the Lil' Lady Sting basketball team. It was made up of girls from 1 & 2 grade. In the league, they didn't keep score on a game clock, although the girls knew what the score was week to week. We didn't keep track of wins and losses, although coach would say 4-3. I had a blast. Here are some coaching lessons I learned or was reminded of after coaching these girls from November-February:

• The concept of winning is instilled inside a kid!
• Rewards motivate people.
• Motivation is found in very small things at times.
• Practice makes better.
• Team sports are a must for kids.
• Time flies-so take the most of opportunities presented to you.
• Your enthusiasm sets the pace for those around you!
• The attention spans of 1-2 grade girls is...ooooh look a bird.
• Girls are highly emotional...at all ages.
• Leadership traits can be identified as early as 1st grade.
• Kids respond well when parents invest in their lives.
• Follow the Leader & the Quiet Game are fun at all stages of life.
• Snack time is a huge part of the game.
• Hi-Fives should be given every day to a team member you see.
• Growth happens when you learn what it takes to get better, and do it.
• A coach should push every team member to become better.
• A coaching connection is vital for the sake of the team.
• Celebrate the wins and don't dwell on losses for too long.
• Investing in the lives of kids is a rewarding experience.

So many more things come to mind, but the fact is, I was truly blessed coaching this great group of girls.

Discipleship Discussions

If you hung out with Jesus for any period of time when He walked this earth, you would know that He had some important one-on-one discussions. If you walk with Him now, you will also know that it doesn't take very long before He has these same conversations through prayer, the Word, or an encounter with someone He has crossed in front of your journey. “COME & SEE” was the invitation he offered to the disciples when He asked them to follow Him. He used parables, visual aides, questions, and homework to draw those who followed in discussions of discipleship. If we don’t become explorers and stay with our boat of small groupers tied to the same routine, we will get bored with the scenery of discipleship making, frustrated with our leaders, and people will look for a new adventure in a new boat. People want to learn, and learners want to explore. They are thirsty, they want an adventure filled with faith risks, they want to learn from the scriptures, they want challenge from questions, they want new and fresh ideas to make the discipleship process interesting. What they don’t want is a boat tied to a shoreline, that does not move and the scenery looks the same every time you meet. Jesus was creative with His discipleship, and as a follower of Him, we must be also. Jesus asked questions, offered adventure, and peaked curiosity...as leaders we should do the same thing. After all, Jesus gave us some great examples of how to do it.

Customer Service & the Church

Fantastic customer service is something all people hope for when they walk into a place of business. I tend to do more business with those who give me great customer service. You know the WOW experiences. Restaurants, car repair, home repair, online stores, clothing stores, and churches are the places that I have etched out in my mind as places I want to re-consume. I am loyal to those who go above and beyond. I want to be WOO'ed. As a consumer I want to put my money where I will get the best deals and the best customer service. The CHURCH is one place where customer service has got to be the best. I have had some bad experiences at churches-and I work for one. I also have had above an beyond service in a few churches. I believe that the fastest growing churches are the ones that have some of the best customer service. On any given day of the week, a guest will walk onto the campus. I view a guest, as ANYONE who enters the church. Guests on Sunday include the youngest person to the oldest person, volunteer or non-volunteer, first time or life long attender, the staff member or the non-staff member. Here are some places you should consider as you think about customer service:

• The Hospitality
• Behind the Scenes
• The WOW Presence or Factor
• Follow-Up
• Signage & Flow
• Am I Important enough to go noticed or am I unnoticed?

I have walked into churches and walked out declaring I would never go back. I have also been a guest at churches and said, I would go there if I lived in that town. Part of my current position is to make sure that we leverage people to make guests experiences great. I'm looking at making great experiences from the moment someone drives on to our church campus-on any given day. Whether you work for a for-profit or non-profit, I will tell you this- people are consumers and they will be return customers if you have great customer service. If not, you'll see their car parked at your competitor next go around. Something to think about, because all of us can tweak one thing to be better at customer service. So take that as an opportunity to put your thoughts to action. GO!

The Art of PREVISION

It can be a lost art, right up there with hieroglyphics, the wooden wheel, and parachute pants. I'm referring to an art that people should put in their repertoire, its called: prevision. It is the art of foreseeing a potential danger. The key is seeing it and then avoiding it. As you race through life, I'm sure you may have had glimpses of it. The cop car going the other way, causing you to slow down before a speed trap. Maybe the premonition to avoid a certain aisle at the supermarket so you don't get stuck in line. In the world we live in I'd like to say I try and live by prevision. We live in a reality were crazy things happen. I am not immune to sin, temptation, and getting caught in the crossfire. The great preacher, Billy Graham lived by prevision. He had a person with him at all times, as he traveled, to make sure that he was never caught in a compromising situation. Good thing, because there were people who tried to stage things to take him out. Prevision is something that is an art. It is something that can be learned and should be. As a leader in whatever you do, people will put you on a pedestal and hope you fall. It is the cut-throat culture of success people aim for of knocking off the person in front of them, however they need too. Sometimes it is to take away their position, prestige, and power-hey this trick of knocking people off is something Satan practices regularly. There are guard rails and concepts to put in your life that will help with your attempt at prevision. As you go through your day, look for things that you can identify as potential danger or trouble, and then avoid them. Now, I am one to take a trip on the adventure side on occasion-I'm not speaking of adventure that brings danger. I'm speaking of stupidity that brings danger to you and your reputation. So guard your heart, mind, family, thoughts, career, name, and in my case relationship with Jesus. Living with prevision will take you farther, will give you more opportunity, and bring you results that put your life on track and help you live above reproach. So forget hunting down a pair of parachute pants, or widdling a wooden wheel out of that tree stump in your back yard, and just work on prevision.

Small Group Life Leadership

What does it take to be a Small Group Leader at ECC? As I think about this question a few things come to mind. However, I want to focus on the why, first. Leadership is important in many facets of life. Why leadership? Well, because if no one steps up to lead then chaos normally follows. You can turn on your television at any moment during the day right now, to have that point proven. The fact is simple: WE NEED LEADERS. Small group life is no different. We need people who can walk alongside others and help lead healthy conversations. Jesus was a Master at this-yes, pun intended. He picked a handful of guys, and fed into them with discipleship discussions, corrective conversations, equipping exchanges, and encouraging encounters. For Jesus, He was a natural, for the rest of us they are learned. Yes, they can be and should be learned. Why leadership? Right now, we need men and women to step up and walk with others through life and help them develop friends who will live life together. It is about growing relationally, spiritually, and journeying together through this things we call life. ECC is at a harvest time in our Small Group Ministry and we are excited to be launching new small groups in the days to come. We need leaders and hosts to step up and step in. We will as a church walk alongside you, give you the tools to lead, and development ops to be a leader in small group life. Some of our current groups have leaders stacked up and shelved, and instead of multiplying as we have done in year's past, we will be activating and launching new groups. The key is leadership and if you are willing to lead, we are willing to help you by walking with you. Lives are being transformed at ECC and a part of our mission is to help connect these transformed lives to others.

People in your LIFE- a case for small groups.

Launching Small Groups at any church can be fun, exciting, challenging, and confusing. Small groups are really about a few key elements: connecting in community, life transformation, and being doers of God's Word. Whether intentional or not, food normally plays into the small group mentality too. That being said, we are about to explode small group life, so that more people can experience community in a way that says, "We don't want you to do life alone." Really as you walk through life, do you really want to live life alone? 1 in 4 Americans live life alone or isolated, and because of this, many of these 'loners' are on meds for depression. So, is there a direct correlation between those who encircle themselves with people? Well, we do know this- the people with friends and support systems live life longer. So, what will it take for you to engage in a small group where you can live life with people who care for you? Life is busy, I get that, as the father of 3 kids who are busy. Life is unpredictable-I get that, as I sat with a friend recently in a hospital, as his daughter had major surgery. I counseled a couple recently, and my walk away challenge to them was they need to get mutual friends in their life, or theirs will become very lonely. When this crazy world shatters the ideals that we thought were solid, you need people to walk with you. The point is this- small group friends should last for life. They will live life with you and in this world, the ups and downs are sometimes too bearable to walk at it alone. Are you connected to a small group? You should be!

Move: Quick thoughts on my last read

MOVE: What 1,00 Churches Reveal About Spiritual Growth Greg L. Hawkins & Carry Parkinson

Quick Summary: Move is aimed at helping churches get a grasp of what they can do to offer the best impact for spiritual growth. These results challenged the core assumptions from church leadership and helped identify the most effective ways to move people to greater love for God and others. Move offers a challenge to church leaders to not assume people move toward God because they sit in church on Sunday; but rather a challenge to look deeply, and provide the right tools and resources to engage people and build disciples and followers of Christ.

Key Insights:

• Participation in church activities does not necessarily drive spiritual growth. Less is more, not more is better.

• Those in the Growing in Christ category are willing students & active participants in church programs, but are less likely to express their faith outside the church.

• Close to Christ- most want from church leaders, to challenge them to take personal responsibility for their own spiritual growth.

• Between those who are Close to Christ and those who are Christ-Centered-is perhaps the most difficult line to cross.

• We(church) let those who sit in our services remain comfortable having Jesus as their friend, helping them live their lives, but never learning to fully surrender to his leading. We must give them opportunity through invitation to respond.

• Serving is the most catalytic experience offered by the church.

• 3 Key strategies to get people moving: Make destination clear; make the spiritual jump start non-negotiable; make the lead pastor the champion. I think ECC does all these things well.

Personal Application

• We must have measurable goals. Kennedy, King, Lombardi, Jobs, all reached goals each with difficult achievements ahead of them, yet all began with clear, unambiguous goals.

• Scripture is the only catalyst that appears in the top 5 of the three movements. The Bible transcends all other catalysts, when it comes to spiritual growth. I just go back to II Timothy 3:16.

• To create ownership we must: empower people to be the church; equip people to succeed; hold people accountable.

• Pastor the local community- The word pastor is used as a verb instead of the word serve. The culture of church ministry is no longer those who meet inside the walls on Sunday, but we must raise up and engage pastors to pastor their cities. These are the churches that will remain strong.

Meaningful Quotes

• "…not because we came up with another creative program, but because we were willing to face, and act, on the truth; increased church activity does not lead to spiritual growth. p.25

• Those who are interested in Exploring Christ segment are clear interested in Jesus…and we shouldn't shy away from being direct." p. 33

• Coming to faith in Christ isn't just a matter of convincing people of the truth. It's a work of the Holy Spirit. p.37

• "Our work as spiritual leaders in the church is to help catalyze spiritual movement." p39

• "…a crisis or an ordeal of any kind was a triggering experience for spiritual surrender….breaking an emotional wall-are not prerequisites for a Christ-centered life." p.159

• "When the church increasingly promotes all the things people should do, it's easy for them to lose sight of the real goal-which is who they should become." "..away from self centered and toward Christ centered." p 165

• "embed the Bible in everything." p219

• 3 Strategies to Pastor the local community: Set a high bar for serving the church and the community; Build a bridge into your local community; make serving a platform for the gospel. p.240

Safe Place-Small Groups

Being involved in a group of friends that truly care for you can be both beneficial and a must. At the same time, I think people need environments in life where it is a safe place to speak freely and express their opinions. Is your small group a safe place? Here are some thoughts I picked up from an article a while back from a magazine:

Here are 9 ways we can create a safe place environment in small group life:
1. Provide a supportive nonjudgmental space.
We must learn o provide a safe place for people to discuss real issues without fear of rejection.
2. Be genuine
The ability to be real is so important. When we are attentive, respectful, and above all human, people feel comfortable to share real struggles.
3. Show empathy
When we make a sincere effort to understand and identify with another’s pain, we can help in the healing process.
4. Err on the side of grace
It does not do any good to heap condemnation on someone who’s trying to work through their own issues.
5. Communicate acceptance and show love
People need to be loved just because.
6. Be a friend
Friends are a much needed resource.
7. Share from your life
You may not be able to relate exactly, but you have experienced your own personal struggles. You can help put the struggles into perspective and give them hope.
8. Care enough to confront
Love enough to give honest feedback, but speak the truth in love.
9. Instill hope and lead them to resources that will help
It has been said you can live 40 days without food, 4 days, without water, 4 minutes without air, but you can’t live seconds without hope. Be an encourager.

I hope this helps you find a group where you can find these concepts applied. As a small groups pastor, I feel it is important to create this culture and leverage them in your church's small group ministry. For it to be a safe place, you have to be intentional. So, go for it!